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Known for his works of fiction, upon the release of his memoir chronicling the lives of his parents, I was more than excited to read his book Between Them when it was released. Somehow, the hardcover sat accruing dust over seven years until I noticed it and immediately kicked myself for not reading it. His recent titles, such as “Canada” and the five novels, cover the life of the sports journalist Frank Bascombe (I’ve yet to read the fifth installment) were all filled with a linguistic grace that makes Mr. Ford incredibly and effortlessly quotable.
This memoir does the same, with its 175 pages flying by at an alarmingly comfortable pace, all the while stopping you on occasion with some powerful observations. The book is broken up into two parts, in which the memoirs of his parents are presented separately, as they were written nearly thirty years apart.
The true power in this memoir is how much Mr. Ford influences the reader to take a step back and reflect on their relationships with their parents – even though he mentions that no one really does have a relationship with their parents within the book. Powerful observations about how the roles of fathers changed with generations, how the internal lives of others are never truly known to their children, but that children are extremely intuitive at piecing the unseen and unspoken to develop the foundation for their worldview.
The lives that our parents lead before they have children vary from marriage to marriage. Mr. Ford’s parents came to have him fifteen years into their marriage, so as a result, he was always an outsider to their household. His parents spent all their time together, with his mother accompanying his father on his business trips along the American South. The bond and genuine love shared by Mr. Ford’s parents rings truest throughout the book and easily outshines any of the blemishes that arose during his time with his parents.
Between Them is an unusual memoir, but it is quite possibly the most powerful one I have read to date. Mr. Ford’s perspective of looking back on both of his parents without knowing the entire picture, but as he said about himself as a child, he had a good sense of what was real, and this is surprisingly true for a lot of us who grew up with parents who were actively present. This being said, I know plenty of people who never really got to know their parents, either through an early and untimely death, prison sentences, or uninvolved parents. This book has a lot to offer them as well.
There were moments when reading this book that I naturally compared my parents to Mr. Ford’s, and I started remembering details of my childhood and teenage years that were long forgotten. Though most of these memories were with my parents present, some were noticeably without them, for even a parent’s absence can leave a lasting impression.
When reviewing and recommending books, none are easier to recommend than Between Them. Mr. Ford’s prose is incredibly refined and easy to read, and the book’s length means it can be completed in one day. More importantly, the power of imposing an introspective look at one’s own life is an incredible gift that Mr. Ford gives his readers. So, if you are stuck in an airport or in any other situation where you would like to have a few hours fly by, but not mindlessly, do yourself a favour and pick up a copy of Between Them.