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Note: this article was originally written by hand while waiting for my lunch order to be prepared at a café on January 11th, 2025. This piece is being published on Martin Luther King Jr. Day and on a day when many people will be overexposed to the news. I hope that this article will give you, dearest reader, a tool or two to navigate a potentially toxic news cycle in the upcoming four years.

Proof that I do manage to get out…
The idea for this article came from receiving my yearly reading review from my newspaper. I placed within the top 2% of the Financial Times readers, and though I did feel a little pride, I was immediately troubled, and I knew why. As I now enjoy the immediate ambiance of a calm and peaceful café near my house, my pen hit the paper of my notebook with an initiative that had not happened since the new year.

… and yet I possibly still need to get out more.
Most people either know that I am a big reader or, as in the case of most strangers, they can sense it. This, unfortunately, opens the door for others to launch into a discussion about current events and politics. It also does not help that I am a smiling extrovert with golden retriever energy. Still, I am always surprised when someone in a random lineup at the self-checkout aisle at Costco wants to hear about my take on the Canadian prime minister resigning.
The one possible good consequence of the pandemic was that people started, somehow, informing themselves about the world around them at a higher frequency than before. I write “somehow” for the sources that most people turn to are not peer-reviewed or written with any consideration of journalistic ethics. Fact-checking is time-consuming and expensive, and it takes actual work.

Everything is fine (fire emoji)…
The majority of conversations like these included me sitting quietly as the other party told me about something they read before launching into a monologue about their take. My good friends have noted seeing me recoil into a psychological fetal position in real-time as this happens. When pressed for a reply, three things usually happen.
First, if I do not know the person all that well, I literally leave while making severely awkward eye contact – this usually induces laughter. I apply this same tactic if someone does not respect my boundaries and tries to goad me into an argument. I do have the luxury of being bigger and more intimidating than most humans, so this tactic may not work for everyone, golden retriever energy or not.
Second, if the other party got their information from a questionable source or is fully inhaling conspiratorial vapours, they start an argument when I refuse to give a comment. These individuals make up a large portion of the population who want to convert everyone into their belief systems. Being someone who reads anywhere from two to six hours a day, this subset of people feels personally attacked if I do not align with their worldview or forecasting of why the world is the way it is.
Third, if I know and respect the person I am conversing with, thankfully, things are a little more civil. Sadly, however, it is not so gratifying for them. I usually begin with a large inhale and begin. Then, I fill in any gaps in their monologue with data points they may have missed. Unfortunately for them, I may go into how they can address their discomfort on a scientific level and better cope with the topic moving forward. Close friends lean in at this point, while others sit back in fear. This ultimately may have made me a less attractive target for conversations, but I honestly prefer it this way.

The joys of writing while not being assaulted by grammatical and spelling correction software.
The more I read, the harder it is for me to have an opinion on a matter I did not experience or investigate firsthand. Last year, I had a discussion with a good friend and when I told him this and the fact that I wholeheartedly believe that my opinion does not matter, he had an understandable reaction:
“Is this because you lack confidence,” his concerned voice asked.
“Not at all. It is precisely because I am extremely confident that I know exactly how much my opinion does not matter. I do not feel the need to engage in formulating one for the purposes of this conversation.”
Due to how we gauge the intelligence of others and ourselves, we conflate having an opinion with that of being intelligent. There is nothing wrong with having a well-informed opinion, but using the data one has been exposed to in order to extrapolate causes or forecast events in a matter in which one has no expertise usually results in looking like a fool. The analogy I once gave for this to a friend was that we are all cavemen yelling at the world from the entrance of our cave. Yet, as social animals, this is how we typically try to convey to others how intelligent we are. Just think of how people try to impress one another at events as a hyper-focused example of small talk and how we desperately try to convey to others that we are worthy of their time and resources. This is, of course, vastly different than actionable intelligence, in which one puts their knowledge and expertise to direct use to optimize an outcome – this is where intelligence is tangible and valued in reality, usually with a salary or hourly rate.

Start with the small talk…
Lastly, before we get into how I managed to avoid such conversations in the past year, one last item needs to be addressed. Freud, among his many theories, stated that the smaller the differences between two people on a position, the higher the chances of their personal identities leaning into those differences. This is where, on the face of it, major conflicts between two seemingly similar religious sects can occur. This directly puts close friends and those who would otherwise put fruitful and long relationships at risk.
Last year, the world witnessed over half of the population go to the voting booth in an attempt to elect their next leaders. This naturally resulted in heated discussions and an overexposure to the news. As with any other prolonged exposure to a stressful stimulus, we naturally begin to disengage and, in this case, become less informed. Controlling one’s exposure to media is not easy, but it is much easier than the highly productive method and tool I have used for the last few months.
If any conversation becomes apparent that there will be topics such as politics and current events covered, I quickly and forcefully interject and have said the following:
“Before you begin, just be aware that I do not have an opinion on any of the matters discussed today and will not offer any views or potential solutions. By all means, feel free to get what you deem necessary off of your chest, but know that I will not respond in kind.”
This always leads to immediate disappointment, but it corrects the expectations of others and sets the tone. When I have not done this in the past, it resulted in the opposite party feeling like I was not participating in the conversation because I did not agree with their views. Even if I do agree with the other party, I still do not offer an opinion – see Freud’s narcissism of minor differences above. Using this tactic has been effective in both social and professional settings, for setting boundaries and expectations is vital.
A positive side effect of doing this is that others within the groups one frequents also start adopting the policy of not talking about combative topics. They, too, start to appreciate the level of peace that is blanketed over the group. They then focus on matters we all care about – such as our families and trying to navigate the current cost of living crisis.
The next four years will be highly tumultuous for those of us who have been accustomed to the relative level of calm since the fall of the Berlin Wall. Most of us do not have the tools necessary to move through our current environment that is saturated with false or accurate information while having to justify our opinions at seemingly every turn. Setting parameters and thresholds for oneself is key to not being overwhelmed or unnecessarily cornered. Our most valuable resource is time, and letting others waste it in an aggravating manner is not something you are obliged to put up with. Protect your time and your peace.